Thoughts for tonight

Well I was just wondering:  If you live alone and died tonight how long would it be till someone found you dead.   I'm just guessing here but it may be 1-7 days for someone to check on me and find my body, or it maybe longer.  I really don't know.

The fact of the matter is, I moved to FL to take care of my mother on a full time basis, which I was very much glad to do.  I really enjoyed my time with her and I miss her greatly.   I'm living in her house and trying to make it my own and I am doing pretty at the progress of this, however it will take time, but sitting here tonight the thought above came into mind.  For what reason I do not know.   However my question is to all of you that live alone;  "If you died tonight how long would it be till someone found out about it."   Like I said above it might be 1-7 days, if I was still in the burgh it might be longer, I really don't know.

I'm not a person that keeps in touch with anyone, why I don't know.  I try to occasionally keep in touch with family.  I called my Mom at least once a month, sometimes more, but now she's gone, so I cannot call her anymore.   My siblings, well maybe once a year or so.  Too bad for me.  

The one I was most in touch with was the one that called me the most because she always wanted to keep in touch.    I must say I have called my siblings however sometimes it has been to no avail, other times not.   Oh well that's neither here nor there.

It is now and I need to learn how to keep in touch.    How about you???  Do you need to keep in touch or get reacquainted with family members???

I have always kept in touch with my son and my mother.  I have occassionally tried to contact my siblings (I have 5 siblings) however since we don't live in the state (or didn't at the time and their phone # changed frequently it was difficult) I couldn't always keep in touch.

I must say always keeping in contact with Mom I knew what was going on with my siblings and their kids.  That was a blessing to me.    Now I'm wondering, alot of wondering going on here.

Mom is gone so I can no longer get updates and I wonder did everyone else get updates from her?!    Who wll take her place to give updates: and did they only listen because it was her that gave them, did they care, did they pray.    I don't know.

One thing I do know is that someone has to keep up with everyone, however also I do know that what ever is said to anyone cannot be repeated to anyone else in the family, for they are relying on the person they told it to, they said it in confindence.

However it is my feeling if it's told in confidence and it's a problem: prayer is needed so it can be shared without exposing the person or the problem because God knows.

Well as I said isn't it sad that no one know???  Does any one care.    Just thoughts for tonight!!!!

Here am I with my thoughts

I'm cold, tired and done. Oh also confused. Well maybe I should'nt be. I'm just feeling a bit out of it right now and undirectional. If that makes any sense to anybody. Also a bit overwhelmed right now. Oh well I know I'll get over it. Any suggestions would be great!!!

I'm tired and don't know what to do.  My faith seems to be failing me, and I often wonder where is God.  I will never quit believing for what else do I have.  Nothing!

However I just can't help but wonder is He there and does He care.  I know deep within He does care, but why oh why do I feel like I've been deserted.   Maybe it's because I've desereted Him or maybe I just got placid.  I do not know.

The only thing I know right now is I'm feeling a bit lost and confused and just a little bit lonely.       I'm just trying to figure the whole thing out (what ever that may be)

What am I suppose to be doing, what is my direction, what is my life's purpose.   I do not know right now and that frustrates me.   I'm sure God will let me know.   In the meantime: oh I don't even know.

I have bills that need paid, obilgations to me meant and so on and so on.   OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Life can be so frustrating!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Well all I can do now is just keep plugging along and do my best and try to figure out what it is that I'm suppose to do with my life.   Pray to God everyday and wait for the answer.

I know sometimes He gives an answer thru other people so if you have a comment or suggestion that would be awsome.

Thanks for reading.
Julia

Just some thoughts

Well right now I'm just trying to understand my siblings here.   I hear different things from different people (siplings).  They say that they would tell the other what they have told me, but I don't think they do.  The reason for that is because of other things I hear from them.

Ok then this is confusing as all heck.   I have to come to my own conclusions.   I have somewhat of a conclusion as to how they think of each other and it seems to me that they don't really like each other.   I'm sure it's for reasons of their own.

I have also realize that each of them thinks the other is self centered.   Aren't we all just a little bit.  Or at least we have got to look out for ourselves and rely on God to take care of us.

With all that being said, look to God and rely on Him and forget about the rest.   Just remember this: "Your siblings love you they just really don't know and they are trying to learn."   This goes for friends also.

Well I'm just going to end this for now and write more at a later time, my brain is not working properly right now.



Thanks for visiting.

Life goes on.

June 22

To Dad

Hello again folks,

Obviously I'm in the mood for writing today.   Well this is something that I wrote over 10 yrs ago when my daddy died.  Unfortunately I couldn't find the final version, I know it's here somewhere.  With that being said I hope you enjoy the poem that I wrote.     Well here we go, and as always comment are greatly appreciated.

 My Poem for Daddy,    (Life goes on)

 Sitting here feeling the cold autumn wind blow through my hair. it sends a chill down my spine as I look over the lake and listen to the quiet around me.  The setting sun, intense rays, reflect boldly off the water’s surface.  It is blinding but the warmth is soothing.

 The lake is full of Mallards and an occasional seagull flies by.  I sit quietly and listen as I gaze upon the trees that surround the lake with their brilliant colors of autumn.   Scarlett, burning orange, glowing yellow, while shades of amber, copper & pale orange peek through.  The dark forest green of the fir trees give a soft touch to the brilliance that surrounds them.

 I gaze at the beauty that surrounds me with all its brilliance and know that in just a short while it will all be gone.  Soon the trees will be bare and the gray appearance of death will take over except for the few evergreens that stand by and weep for their loss.

 I sit and listen; I can hear the trees weep.  They thought the others would always be with them, but the time had come for the older trees to depart.

 The evergreens watched in wonder as the others started to change from their luscious green to the brilliant colors of yellow, red, orange, shades of amber, gold and a hint of gray.  Never knowing what it meant, nor understanding, for they were always green.  This was new to them.

 Then another change began to take place, this change frightened the evergreens for among their own kind when the leaves turned brown and started to tall it meant certain death.  Death and sorrow now surrounded them.  This was something that few had ever seen.  They were at a loss as to what to do, how could they help, how could they stop it.  There was nothing that could be done and they bowed their heads in sorrow.

 All the trees were now bare and the color of grey ash, they had gone to sleep for the winter.  The evergreens did not know and they wept.  They wept tears of sorrow and of joy.  Sad they lost their fellow trees and for the love of the new ones. And that they were no longer suffering the pains of winter.  For they realized that in dying there is new life: a life full of wonder and great expectations.  Life just waiting to be lived and enjoyed no matter what happens.  ©

 Enjoy your day and live life to the fullest as we all should or at least strive to.

Whose your hero.

 I just wanted to share this with you.  It's something I wrote awhile ago regarding my Mom.

 My hero is my mother; she has always been an inspiration to me. She was the one person in the neighborhood that was willing to give the shirt off her back to help someone. She never turned anyone away that was in need. She was always there for whoever needed her. I wish I was more like her!

 I remember one time our house caught on fire (I was very young at the time).  How scary is that!  Well to make a long story short, the fire was put out and we were not displaced.   However none of our neighbors came to help.  It was a cold wintry night and we (my sisters and brothers)  were sitting in a car with no heat and blankets wrapped around us.   I could see the neighbors peaking out their windows wanting to know what was going on.   Did any of them help or bring us in out of the cold???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!     NO they did not!!!!!!!   

 Imagine that!.

 The one that would've helped could not as her house was also in danger of exploding for it was a gas leak and her house was up close to ours, she did however make sure we (the kids) had enough blankets to keep us warm.  I noticed that she glanced up at the neighbors peering out their windows in discuss.

 Moving forward

 Well, just a block over from us there was another fire!!!!!!     HHHHMMMMM!   Do ya think anyone went over??????????

WELL GUESS what!! My MOM did!!!!  She walked down to see what she could do to help.    She offered coffee, hot chocolate, tea, to the firefighters (who said weren't we just at your place?) and offered a place to stay for the folks whose place was on fire.

Yes the firefighters were just at our place and yes they were amazed that my mother was there to help, because no one, absolutely no one was there to help mom or her family.

 Regardless of that my mother was there to give assistance anyway she could, no matter what.  She didn't care that no one came to help her and her family, she didn't hold a grudge nor did she judge. 

  Mom always did what was right, honest, truthful and everything else good.  No questions asked, she did what needed to be done and was always there if anyone, I REPEAT anyone needed her.  It didn't matter to her if they were friend or foe, if you needed help, she was always there!!!!!!!!!!!

I really don't know how she did it, but she did.  She was always there for family, friends and foes.

IMAGINE THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 I want to be that person, who has no discriminations, what so ever! And loves no matter what!

 I love you MOM!!!!!!!!!!!     You are the sunshine, rainbow and strength of my life.   Thank you for everything

 I hope you enjoyed reading this true life event. ©   All items posted are copy write so you may not use them without permission.

Imagine That

July 28

Imagine that

Well imagine that I have a lot to tell tonight, I'm just not sure which story I should tell first.   Hmm imagine that as my youngest bother would say.  Well with that being said I guess I'll start with that. 

 My brother and I had a long conversation about family and what that means to us.  We are 14 yrs apart but we have found over the yrs that we do have very much in common.  And we also have found that some of our siblings are: well what do I say here: not so forgiving, no willing to let go, or just snobbish and think they are better than the rest of us.

 HMMMM!!!!!   Imagine that!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Just so you know I come from a family of six children.  Well trying not to go into a long history some of us made it some did not the some that did are starting over, the ones that were looked up to are no longer and the ones frowned upon are not no longer: but then again: who knows????

 Oh well what we discovered in this conversation together was that you cannot ever, ever hold a grudge! It will tear you apart: I know that from personal experience, from many years ago.  I will not go into that but I will let you know if you are holding a grudge against anyone you are only hurting yourself not the person you're holding the grudge against for they do not know nor do they care!!!

 This is important: the reason I say this is that I've been there and have done that.   They do not know so they do not care, I found this out by meeting the person that I had a grudge against several years after the fact, (of the thing that caused me to have a grudges against this person) that’s when I realized she didn't have a clue that I really didn't like her or that I had a grudge against her.

 I found at that time when I saw her after so many years, that she didn't have a clue as to how I felt and she was happy to see me.  I came to realize that the wrong that she had done me (or so I thought) was not that big a deal.   Yes, maybe at the time it was a big deal, however at the time I really didn't look at her side of the story.

 Well all I have to say right now is that we need to learn to forgive people their short comings, and we need to learn how to love one another, NO MATTER WHAT!   

 I know this is hard, I know it's difficult, I also know it seems impossible:  I know I've   been there, it is hard, difficult, and almost impossible: I also know it can be done.

 Don't ever, ever give up you can do it, you can forgive, you can move on, you can have a relationship with that sibling that you never thought was possible.   It can happen.

 I just found a new relationship with my youngest brother (14 yrs apart we are) who I never thought I'd ever, ever, ever, get to know!   IMAGINE THAT!!!!!    We have found common ground and we're getting to know each other.  WHAT A WONDERFUL THING!!!!!

 So don't ever, ever, ever give up on what you think is impossible, because it is not impossible, nothing is impossible!!!!  It's just the beginning of a new day and new possibilities!!!  DON'T EVER, EVER forget that.

 Till next time, love, peace, joy and all happiness to everyone that reads this.

There is light at the end of the rainbow.

 Thanks for stopping by and thanks for reading

Till next time, enjoy life and all it has to give

Crucifixion Of Jesus

Crucifixion Of Jesus